I'm a health and safety professional. In my spare time, I'm also a middle aged woman. And in the past 10 years, I've gone out on a lot of dates. I mean a lot of dates. What I do in my professional and private lives would seem to be completely unrelated. But let me tell you, ladies and gentlemen, it's amazing how much dating and running a health and safety program have in common.

Bad Judgement in Men and Safety Jobs

Some people were born with good dating genes. Not me. I'm shy and generally scared of the whole dating process. And my judgement in choosing men is suspect, to say the least. I fall for charmers: the men with handsome faces, intelligence and a tender word or compliment but who always seem to be lacking in the meaningful qualities upon which successful relationships are based. You know, qualities like fidelity, compassion, kindness and commitment.

The disappointment I've experienced upon learning that Prince Charming is actually a frog is not at all unlike how I've felt after what I imagined to be a dream job turned out to be a nightmare. I remember one episode. I had started with such high hopes. The job sounded so nice and had such a lovely title: Health and Safety Manager. My job description said I was responsible for health and safety. And that's exactly what I was. Any time something went wrong and somebody got hurt, I was held responsible. What I wasn't allowed to do was something to fix the problems. Once more I had been seduced by sweet talkin' and a lack of substance.

Bad Dates & Bad Jobs

Some health and safety jobs remind me of the engineer I once dated. It was a nightmare. He took me to the cheapest restaurant in Old Strathcona. The traffic was horrendous and I was running a whole five minutes late. Now I don't think it's polite to keep a date waiting. But his reaction seemed over the top. He paged me on my blackberry eight times!

When I got there, things only got worse. He proceeded to play games with the waitress moving his coffee cup so she couldn't fill it. I was not amused, having worked my way through university as a waitress and knowing what it was like to encounter his type. He didn't leave a tip and, as he didn't drive, insisted that I drive him home. Out of sympathy for a fellow traveller, I left the waitress a tip and told him to take the bus.

That should have been the end of the story. Any normal guy would have gotten the message that I wasn't interested. But not this guy. I made the mistake of giving him my business card. For the next week, he directed a constant stream of e-mails and phone calls in my direction until I felt that I wasn't so much being wooed as stalked. Thankfully, he gave up and I never heard from him again.

Some of my health and safety jobs left me feeling the same way. You start out being responsible for health and safety. . . then personnel. . . then security-all without extra pay. Soon you feel like you're being stalked by your job. Eight-hour days morph into 16 and then 21. Sleeping makes you feel guilty and in dereliction of duty. When you finally complain, you get served up a big helping of "the last health and safety director never complained." Of course, what they don't tell you is that he suffered a nervous breakdown and ended up in an insane asylum in Ponoka.

Conclusion

I recently saw a movie where the actress, a British gal, was thrown into a prison in Thailand. Afterwards, she was asked how she had survived such a horrific experience. Her response: "Being in that Thai prison was better than being single and in the dating scene in London."

I hear you, sister! Just substitute Edmonton for London and I'm right there with you. So I'll conclude this exercise in self-awareness by calling on all of you men and women to enjoy your work as a health and safety professional and to remember that, through it all, you are making an important difference. Oh, and can you do me one little favour? If any of you know a nice, single, handsome, intelligent man of character age 45 to 55, please send him my way!

HISTORIC MOMENTS IN WORKPLACE SAFETY

President Grover Cleveland: Signed 1894 law making Labor Day a national holiday

The Origins of Labor Day

By Glenn Demby

My colleague, Catherine Jones, insists that Canada invented Labor Day-or Labour Day, as she and her compatriots call it. In fact, it was the international labor (no "u") movement that advocated the creation of a day to celebrate the economic and social achievements of workers.

But Canadians did play a leading role in getting the holiday adopted. In 1872, Toronto printers went on strike for a 54-hour (!) work week. When the union leaders were jailed, 10,000 workers marched in protest. Eventually, the government released the union leaders and revoked the anti-union laws. Some mark the subsequent parades held in celebration as the first Labour Day. However, the Canadian government didn't adopt Labour Day as an official holiday until 1894.

The first Labor Day in the U.S. was celebrated in New York City in 1882. In 1887, five states officially adopted the holiday: Oregon, Colorado, Massachusetts, New Jersey and New York. It would take another seven years for the federal government to recognize Labor Day as a national holiday. As in Canada, impetus was supplied by an incident of labor unrest-the Pullman strike of 1893-94.

Today, Labor/Labour Day is celebrated throughout the world. In most countries, the holiday occurs on May 1, the international day of the worker. Canada and the U.S. celebrate the holiday on the first Monday of each September.

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